Trying to find the right balance


I’m not a napper, so I don’t really find ways to make up sleep necessarily. But what we do [is]—Luke and I are good at strategizing with one another about if the plate’s getting too full—what else can we take off the plate? Because the caregiving is not necessarily going to decrease or get taken off the plate, right? You’ve got to find other things. […] Sleep’s good right now, but a couple of weeks ago it wasn’t. So, we were kind of doing that “Okay, so what can we do?”
[…] Every evening when I come home from work I help Luke eat dinner. So, I said to him, “You know, what would make a difference is if I knew just one day when I didn’t come home from work that you’d already eaten dinner and I can just sit and eat in my own time and visit with you and watch TV and just relax,” right, which we’d never done before because I enjoy eating dinner with Luke. It’s fine, but it just made a difference somehow that this little thing gave me a little bit of rest where I can’t normally have it. 

Little things. We came up with a brilliant idea a couple of weeks ago: getting our groceries delivered that week. We both really hate grocery shopping. So, we thought, “Oh, our whole one weekend day seems to just get taken up,” the whole afternoon by preparing for grocery shopping, going out grocery shopping, coming home hauling it all upstairs, right? We did that the last couple of weeks and then it freed up more time for just rest and relaxation and fun on the weekend. And that made a really big difference. It was really noticeable to both of us. So, I think it’s about being creative and finding those little spaces where you can find those moments.

View profile