Travelling, holidays and respite


So my escapes are my holidays and I’ll go hiking. And when I go hiking, I try to go up 8,000 feet above tree line where I can stand on top of a mountain, and just that’s when nothing matters. That is when, I don’t know if it is because you’ve got to hike to get up there, so you’re hiking up and you’re working your frustrations, you’re hot. Maybe that’s what it is, but that’s the time when I replenish myself. It is those 2-3 weeks out of the year that, and even then it’s tough because the… and this is a horrible thing to say, but and I feel guilty even saying it, but you know what? When I’m above tree line my cell phone doesn’t work. And so, there’s no phone calls from mom, because she phones me every day. She phones me five to six times a day. There’s no, I don’t have to go to the hospital twice a day. I don’t have to see other people that have no legs, no arms. I just, for those two weeks, despite that fact that I phone my mother every day, that just gives me a bit of a reprieve.

And the good thing is if anything happens, the nephrologists have known mom for so long, for so long, that they basically know like we have a “do not resuscitate order” on mom, because if they had to, they’d crush the sternum. It would be a lot worse for her. And they will know, they know what’s best for her, and they all know what her wishes are. But that’s my biggest fear, is that I’m going to come back from a hike, from a day hike, and there’s going to be, I’m going to phone and they’re going to say, “You need to come home. Your mom’s gone.”

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