Trying to find the right balance


I think it can be a really beneficial thing if you allow it to be. Again, I think it’s finding balance and knowing who you are and finding yourself and still taking care of yourself. I think, honestly, taking care of yourself first is the most important thing. It’s like when you’re on a plane and it descends and you need an oxygen mask, and you put your mask on first and put anyone else’s on second. That can be really difficult. 

And again, being a woman, I think that can be difficult. We feel the need to take care of others and take care of ourselves second. But [by] not taking care of yourself first, then I’m sure you’re not taking as good care of someone else [as] you could. So really, take care of yourself to take care of the other person. 

And healthy boundaries. I think that’s taken me just the last year or two. I’ve really learned what that means, and so sometimes my mom will call and ask for something and sometimes the answer will be no. I think that’s honouring her as a person to not just to do whatever she wants me to do. And she can be really demanding! I don’t have to be there all the time. I don’t have to be, and I shouldn’t be expected to be. I’ve sacrificed a lot and that’s fine; that was my decision and I’m happy to do it. It makes me feel good to know that I’m there for her and I can increase her quality of life, which is really […] my biggest goal. It’s just, to do whatever I can to increase her quality of life, but to a point. I’m not going to take away from my quality of life— sometimes I will—but for the most part, I’m not going to take away my quality of life to increase hers. I’m her daughter and she wants me to be happy. So taking care of me is really honouring me, and honouring her.

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