Susan1 describes how shocking it was to read the diagnosis.

Transcript

I had my chart on my lap back to my room. And I remember opening up and you know the first page has got the diagnosis? And it said ‘end-stage cardiomyopathy’. And that was a huge thing because like the reality really hit me then, wow, like I’m really sick. And so I got back to the room and I was really, really upset. And they came in and talked to me – I’m just reliving this experience again [sniff] so I told them you know how upsetting it was to see that in print. And then the funny thing was, I verbalized my fear, and my anxiety, and then I quickly pulled myself together and I said to them – this is kind of funny. I said ‘so do you think it would be appropriate for – to have some diazepam?’ And they laughed, and laughed, and laughed and they said ‘yes, it would be appropriate for you to have some diazepam.’ It was Ativan. And so I had some and I settled down. And I really only needed it that one time. But it was such a shock to read that you know? So it’s amazing how after all these years it comes back like that you know? All those emotions.

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