Impacts on Partners and Households
Our participants told us about the ways in which long COVID limited their ability to carry out everyday tasks. Some found that living with a chronic condition also impacted them emotionally and psychologically. This changed the ways in which they could participate in the running of a household and function within family relationships.
Impacts on partners and households
Some of the people we spoke with had supportive partners who had taken on many of the household responsibilities that they could no longer cope with. While they were all grateful for this, many also felt uncomfortable with the additional burden this placed on their partners.
Carrie 2 laughingly said that she felt “guilt and shame” because her partner now had to do all the grocery shopping and banking, responsibilities they used to share. Angela told us that, before COVID, her partner “did most of the cooking but I did most of the laundry and cleaning and stuff like that. But now he’s doing all of that kind of thing … It’s a lot to fall on somebody.” Elaine worried about her husband taking on the role of caregiver. As she put it, “[It] breaks my heart that we’ve come to this place.”
Ruth regrets that she can no longer contribute to her house and home as she used to.
Transcript
So we have a country home with land and landscaping and I love gardening, landscaping, and hauling dirt, like all those kinds of things. And we got this house to keep it together. Like keep up with it together. And now everything’s him, and that has affected him, not just […]
Nicole says her husband has taken on both the dad and the mom duties in their family.
Transcript
He’s been really supportive, he hasn’t ever questioned that I’m sick. He knows me, he’s taken on all – not only the dad duties, but the mom duties in our house. And you know he’s making them breakfast, making them lunch, packing their lunch, getting them ready for school, driving […]
Tanya's husband is now the one who has to do it all.
Transcript
I used to have no problems going about my daily life. I was active, felt good … You know, looked after everything that needed to be done for the household, my kids, all their activities, grocery lists, bills being paid on time, and working a full-time job, and so on […]
Tensions around living with a new normal
Several of the people we spoke with told us that the challenges of living with long COVID had strengthened their relationship with their partners and other family members. But even some of those who felt closer to their loved ones described the strain of having to adjust to a new normal. One of the most common issues participants described was tensions over activities that their partner wanted to get back to while they felt unable. For example, as Lori explained, “There’s a cabin that our friends have and ‘Come up, let’s go to the cabin.’ It’s just too much for me or ‘Let’s go camping,’… it’s too much, it’s too hard.”
Kari isn't able to do what she used to and this has led to tensions in her household.
Transcript
With my spouse and I, we aren’t as sociable as we used to be. You know we used to go to hockey games and all those kinds of things, so I think he kind of, they kind of bear the brunt of it with you, without meaning to, right? Because […]
Paulina feels closer to her husband but they are struggling to keep the household running.
Transcript
I mean it’s not perfect. I feel like it’s a little bit – got us a little bit closer and – because now my husband realized how much I did do in the house. I think they kind of took that for granted. Sometimes. You know, laundry’s always done. Dinner’s […]
Anna's husband wants to socialize but her priority is getting better.
Transcript
For example, my husband would now like want to go out, and I’m not that keen on it. Because everything is now being like opening, and like people are – people would like to make up for the two years being in prison, and two years of life lost, and […]
Cher is bedbound and this has caused tensions between her and her husband.
Transcript
With my husband, it’s been interesting. Because I have never felt like I was a jealous person before, but there’s definitely been some strange times where we’ve both had to acclimate and kind of learn how to talk to each other differently than we had before. Because, of course, he […]
Jennifer 2 says she and her husband can no longer have the active life they used to have.
Transcript
I mean my partner and I, we used to be very, very active. Very, very active. We would walk a minimum of 10,000 to 20,000 steps. We would travel several times a year and we would do like pretty intrepid travel. We’ve driven all across Morocco, you know, we’ve been […]
Christine worries that she is often too sore to welcome physical contact from her husband.
Transcript
Well if my husband, yeah, because my body hurts – so if he goes to hug me or something – and I go, “Ow, don’t.” And in the moment what you hear is your spouse telling you to get off you and that’s not – that’s not healthy. And so […]