Managing Personal Challenges with Sleeping and Eating – Christine

 

Christine didn't feel any drive to see her newborn and just wanted to lay in bed and let her husband take over the baby's care.

Transcript

So, I only nursed for maybe three or four days. And then I just started pumping, I thought I don’t need to… It was never important for me to breastfeed, like that was never a, I wanted to give him breast milk. But it wasn’t important that I breastfed, pumping was fine to me. So, after a few days, I said, forget it too much, I’m just gonna pump.

And I tried just doing that. But I would have to wake up every two hours to do it. And that was exhausting. So, if I wasn’t pumping, I was laying down in bed. And my mom, I remember that day stayed all day when he was two weeks old. And I stayed in bed the entire day, I barely saw my son, I didn’t feel this drive to go and see how, see him or hold him. I just wanted to lay in bed.

And I could hear my mom on the phone with her friend saying she was worried about me. And my mom’s someone who’s she doesn’t get overly worked up. So, I knew oh, she’s worried about me something must really not be OK with me. And I felt guilty that I was taking advantage of her to just be there all day so that I could sleep.

And then my husband would come home from work. And I would make him deal with my son because I just couldn’t. I just couldn’t handle it. The idea of being alone with him made me so nervous because I felt really sad and really anxious. So, then I called my doctor and I said, I just think I need to come in and talk about… I remember as soon as I called, she said “What did you want to come about?” I just started crying and said, I just think there’s something not right with me. I’m just not feeling very happy.


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