Susan reached out to family when dark thoughts became too much.
Transcript
I don’t really even know how I was dealing with those thoughts. I guess whenever they would pop into my head I would just try and start thinking immediately of something else or busy myself with something. Just try to keep my mind off of it.
There was one day in particular I remember really thinking about going out into the garage and I remember my daughter was in the swing and she was just screaming her head off and the dog was barking at people and I was just so fed up with everything and I was so upset and I started crying so hard and I couldn’t breathe and I didn’t know what else to do so I called my mother. And she was trying – she was on the phone two hours away, trying to calm me down. And so, I ended up having my brother come over. He lives twenty minutes from here and he just dropped what he was doing, and he came over and he was there for me. So you know, I would try and have people here at the house or go somewhere when I felt that things were getting really bad and I was starting to have those thoughts. And if keeping busy didn’t help, I would either call somebody to come over or I would just pick everything up and go over to someone else’s house just to not be alone.
So, for me it was just not putting myself in those kinds of situations where something could happen and just making sure that there was somebody there and, you know, taking those precautions. And my friends from the support group would make sure that, you know, they were checking in all the time and one girl would call if she hadn’t heard from me in a couple of days or something. She would call and make sure I was okay, a lot of them would text and just say check in with me and let me know how you’re doing. Had the numbers of the crisis line and knowing that I could go to the hospital if I ever felt like I was really in danger. So just having all of those things in your back pocket was good as well
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