Deann explains how she handled talking to her teenage children and why she felt it was important for them to hear about her cancer from her.

Transcript

It was Thanksgiving weekend, and I called my husband and told him you better, you had best come home and I was very upset, he was very upset and he didn’t want me to tell my children. He wanted… and I was like… so that was more upsetting because it was about a week after that I finally told them. They were only in Grade 7 and 9 then. He was like “I don’t think you should tell them.” And I said “You got to tell them, I cannot, I can’t just go and have a mastectomy and not tell them.” I had the lumpectomy done and I didn’t tell them because… and even my mom who’s now 80, he didn’t want her to know. I was like “I’ve got to tell her I can’t, how can you not tell your family.” So that was really tormenting for the first week, how was I going to tell my children. I remember having, I was supposed to go back to work that particular Friday night, and I said to the surgeon “I just can’t go back to work right now.” So about a week later I told them, I said to them “Have you wondered why I’ve not gone back to work yet?” And they were kind of “Yeah” and I said “Well I’ve got to have more surgery.” And then I said “I have had breast cancer and I would rather for you to hear it from me.” Because at that point I was afraid… my husband’s family they have a big construction company and this is a small community. People find out things and then people talk. I’d rather for them to hear it from me than to hear it from one of their friends’ parents or something. So I told them. And I said “I’d rather for you to hear it from me.” And I said “What I’m telling you is the truth and if you have any questions you come to me, I’d rather for you to hear it than to think that I’m hiding something. You’re hearing it from someone else and you don’t know what’s going on, right?”

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