Christiane struggled with the decision to move her husband to a facility; her parents helped her make the decision.
Transcript
So, there was the placement for assisted living, they told me in the month of… Well when you came, it was the 23rd or 27th, I told you, I remember, I saw that in the notes. And then, before the holidays, just before the holidays, they told me that there were still three before him. So, I said, “You won’t call me during the holidays, surely…” But she was telling me, “You can refuse once, then the second time you refuse, well, he goes back to the bottom of the list.” So, they called me, the Friday that was the 7th or 8th of January, and he left Tuesday, the 10th. So I said, “That’s fast, I am not ready for that,” because you have to prepare for that. Me, it wasn’t… I never wanted to put my husband in assisted living. But, he was falling all the time. So, the last weekend, he fell Saturday, he was… he was making the bridge, he had his shoulders in bed, the rest of his body below. Folded. Saturday, Sunday, he was like that. In the night of Sunday to Monday, I had trouble sleeping because it’s stressful to make that decision all alone. I don’t have any kids with him who can tell me, “Well yes. No.” So… Then there are some who say, “Well yes! Put him in assisted living.” But in the end, it’s to get rid of him. So me, that wasn’t my case. So, I believe in that, me. I asked my parents to help me make my decision.
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- Legal issues -ChristianeGetting a mandate in case of incapacity costs a lot of money, which Christiane is unable to pay at this moment.
- The future and caregiving – ChristianeChristiane knows she needs a break; she worries about what will happen to her husband if she gets sick.
- Support from family and friends – ChristianeChristiane finds it difficult to ask friends for help, especially since she is not able to pay them.
- Social impact and lifestyle changes – ChristianeChristiane feels isolated because it seems that her friends don’t want to visit anymore.
- Resources – ChristianeThanks to arrangements made possible by her support group, Christiane is able to attend conferences and other activities organized by the caregivers group.
- Providing support – ChristianeOne weekend, Christiane had to move her husband in bed. And with her back problem, she wonders what might happen if she had to do it again.
- Navigating the system – ChristianeChristiane had to make many phone calls to arrange for things like a wheelchair and home care support.
- Interaction with professionals – ChristianeChristiane told her social worker about a solution she found herself.
- Hospitals and facilities (2) – ChristianeChristiane has to check-up regularly on how the facility is caring for her husband.
- Hospitals and facilities – ChristianeChristiane struggled with the decision to move her husband to a facility; her parents helped her make the decision.