It helps when people actually “get it” and show some understanding about what Sheni is going through.
Transcript
The support that I find is the most helpful is when friends actually get it and they say things like “I don’t know how you do it,” or “It must be really hard. You deserve a medal.” Like, just stuff like that. Or when they do something really nice for me, like if they take me out for dinner or something like that. That’s always nice. Or if they basically— I think that the most important thing is for people to really understand what you’re going through and validate what you’re going through, and listen to you when you’re bitching and you’re really having a hard time. That’s the kind of support that I find the most helpful. And also, another thing that I find really helpful is having friends who don’t mind you calling at almost any time. Like, most people, you can’t call them pretty much between 11 and 8 in the morning.
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- Trying to find the right balance – SheniWhen her husband was in the hospital, Sheni did all she could to help her children through this period.
- Support from family and friends – SheniSheni’s family-in-law did not offer any help. In fact, they made it harder for her.
- Social impact and lifestyle changes – SheniSheni notices that she has a lot less tolerance for other people’s minor problems and this has affected her friendships.
- Legal issues – SheniSheni’s power of attorney was revoked after her sister-in-law contacted the Public Guardian. Sheni thinks it is important to read up on the rules of power of attorney to avoid any issues.
- Interaction with professionals – SheniSheni describes two occasions where she had a disagreement with the doctors.
- Financial impact – SheniSheni and her husband had always been self-employed. In just a few weeks, they lost all their income.
- Impact on professional life and career 2 – SheniWhen her son started radiation therapy for his brain tumour, Sheni had to take time off work. Unfortunately, her manager was not very understanding.
- Impact on professional life and career – SheniIt is difficult to work while caring for someone at home. Sheni dealt with situations that she felt most people never have to deal with.
- Home care and live-in caregivers – SheniSheni found the live-in caregiver very helpful, especially since she could check-in with him at home during the day.
- Health system issues – SheniFor Sheni, it was impossible to work and find care for her husband.