Anne is worried about the day her husband can’t get into his wheelchair, but says, “What will happen will happen, there is nothing I can do about it.”
Transcript
It’s just in the morning getting up. Like, he gets up, you have to make sure he gets into his wheelchair okay. He’s getting really unstable there. I’m worried about that. […] He’s barely making it into his chair now, it’s really rough. And he’s really stubborn, so he’s going do that; he knows once that’s up, that’s his life for him because he doesn’t want to live after that. So he’s really fighting it. So yeah, somebody has to make sure that he gets in there, gets in the bathroom, gets on the toilet and doesn’t fall. And then it takes, after that, it takes him about 3 hours every morning to get up, and go to the washroom, and then wash, and then get back to his bed, and put his clothes on and get up. Like it’s, I mean, if he gets up at 9, he’s ready at 1, right. That’s how long it takes him every day just to get your basic things done, right. He’s been that way for a long time, but it’s getting worse because he’s getting weaker and he’s… so that I don’t know. I have to look at that. I’m kind of avoiding it, kind of thing. I don’t know. Because they—the thing is, with what he had and everything—they all said, “Oh he’ll only live 15 years,” and he’s lived 23 years, right. So, I knew he was going to start getting weaker and everything, but I’m hoping. I don’t want him to go into a home.
My husband, I don’t know, I don’t know what’s going to happen when he can’t even get out of bed at all. I don’t know. He’s in a lot of pain, all the time. I don’t know. I don’t know what’s going to happen. But then, I haven’t known for all these years what’s going to happen, so […] after a while, you just kind of adjust to it, and whatever’s going to happen is going to happen. Nothing I can do about it.
More content
- When care changes over time – AnneRecently, Anne’s husband can barely make it into his wheelchair on his own. She is worried about what will come next.
- Uncovering how and why caregivers care – AnneAnne feels that she would not be able to live with herself, if her husband was in a facility.
- The future and caregiving – AnneAnne is worried about the day her husband can’t get into his wheelchair, but says, “What will happen will happen, there is nothing I can do about it.”
- Support from family and friends – AnneIt was a real shock for Anne that her husband’s family disappeared.
- Interaction with professionals – AnneAnne is frustrated with the lack of care her husband receives, and no longer accompanies him to see the doctor.
- Impact on health – AnneThe stress kept building until Anne was admitted to the hospital for a week.
- Caring for yourself – AnneAnne finds that reading certain books help her manage how she feels.
- Advice for professionals and society – AnneHealthcare professionals should talk to caregivers and remind them that they need to take breaks. Anne ended up in the hospital after breaking down due to stress.
- Advice for professionals and society – AnneHealthcare professionals should talk to caregivers and remind them that they need to take breaks. Anne ended up in the hospital after breaking down due to stress.
- Adapting to new roles and key issues for spouses – AnneAnne feels she has lost her marriage. “When somebody’s chronically ill, they don’t have the energy or the patience.”