Effects of care recipients’ behaviour – Christiane


Christiane’s husband often refuses to eat or take his medication if she is not around, and it is becoming harder to find caregivers with whom he will cooperate.


Like now, he didn’t like it yesterday when there was a new person, because he doesn’t remember who came and who will come. Because he is not allowed… Blocks of 4 to 8 hours. It costs $15 for an 8-hour day; you leave at 12 p.m., you come back at 8 p.m. You have to be back for 8 p.m., it can be in the morning up to… whatever. He didn’t remember, that is why he didn’t want to have supper. When I came back, the patient attendant was feeling badly “he didn’t want to have supper.” Well I said, “Anyway, he had a good lunch.” And I said, “he is still corpulent.” In fact, he wasn’t that hungry, he only had oatmeal when I came home. He was waiting for “his wife”. “My wife will give me some.” “My wife will do this.” “My wife will do that.” It’s always “my wife”. Even if I prepared it. I had made the soup and put it in the fridge. “No, I’m waiting for my wife.” Well, I have to make him understand that I need to have some rest  if I want to continue keeping him with me, I need to take a break. And I must be able to take breaks without worrying. You know I can’t always spent $45 whenever and say “Well now, I am resting”. Like now I asked for it, I will bring him to see them because they are Blacks, I don’t know how he will react. Before he was reacting well. Before he didn’t see the difference between a White person and a Black one. You know, they are human beings, but now he is more… Homosexuals, he is reacting, you know… He didn’t do that before, but now with the sickness. Well, you have to deal with this too. As I had hired a patient attendant, no, he didn’t want to, he said that he was homosexual. I said, “Yes, but did he touch you?” “No, but…” and I said, “Yes, but he is looking for someone his own age, not an old man like you.” No, he didn’t want to, he didn’t want him to care for him. I had to hire another one. So it is always… We don’t have the choice to say “Well…” You know, he wants […]. No, he has to want it.

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