Even though he feels he needs to socialize, Donovan has trouble finding the time.
I’m not getting out and able to do things socially on my own, which I know I need to do, but I don’t seem to be able to work it in. I just found out about this one seniors’ group about 3-4 months ago, and I haven’t been able to do a thing about it. I’m just too busy all the time. There is so much to do to manage the situation, to manage everything: I have to look after everything financially; I have to look after the maintenance of the house, the yard—we have a huge yard. It’s just constant. Absolutely constant. I don’t have any major health problems myself. I don’t have a heart problem or lung problem or anything. I’m just getting older and getting worn out.
I started going to the gym last June. I had been hiking a lot before then, but then that kind of petered out. So I thought, “Okay, I better start going to the gym”. So I’ve been going 3 times/week—not for body building, just to try and maintain some conditioning so that I can feel better. Some people say, “Well, maybe you’re exercising too much when you go,” because I’m tired all the time. But I was tired all the time before I started going to the gym. So that’s not the answer either. Anyway, I spend about 2 ½ hours at the gym working on different machines and I’ve gotten to know some of the people there. So, I can talk or visit a bit—visit ‘a bit’. But, […] I feel very strongly inside of me that I desperately need socializing and I’m not getting it because we’re isolated at home—very isolated.
More from: Donovan
- When care changes over time – DonovanAt one point, Donovan felt his wife needed a wheelchair for her own safety, but she just wasn’t ready yet.
- The Future and caregiving – DonovanDonovan does not see a bright future, and sometimes has suicidal thoughts as a way to escape his situation as a caregiver.
- Resources – DonovanDonovan stopped going to the local caregivers support group as he felt the other caregivers were in different situations.
- Hospitals and facilities – DonovanDonovan and his wife considered all kinds of options, including a facility. In the end, they decided to continue living at home with the help of live-in caregivers.
- Home care and live-in caregivers – DonovanAlthough Donovan was an experienced supervisor in his professional life, he finds it difficult to supervise the two live-in caregivers.
- Financial impact – DonovanThanks to the CSIL program in BC, Donovan’s wife can continue to live at home with live-in caregivers.
- Caring for yourself – DonovanEven though he feels he needs to socialize, Donovan has trouble finding the time.
- Advice for other caregivers – DonovanAlthough Donovan has been hearing the same advice for years, he still has difficulty looking after himself.