Adapting to new roles and key issues for spouses – Elaine (3)

 

Elaine went through periods of anger and feeling sad. She realized later that she had to face up to her role as a caregiver and accept it.

Transcript

I went through periods where I was depressed and angry with our life, and thinking, “Well, how come we have to have this? We’re young, yet we should be able to pick up and go on trips just like nothing; we shouldn’t have to be dealing with all this.” Well, that’s silly; that’s negative thinking. If it’s not us, it’s somebody else. I mean, what’s so special about us that we shouldn’t have this? And we’re not religious, so I don’t think God gives you…I don’t believe in any of that so, it is what it is. My daughter said that about herself when she was 39 years old and got cancer. “It is what it is mom. I’ll deal with it.” And I think that’s a very good statement. You have to face up to that and accept it. Accepting can take quite a long time, but once you do, then I think you can move forward and say, “All right, now I have accepted that this is in my life. Now I can deal with it the best way I know how.” And I want to feel proud of how I look after him.


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