Sheni notices that she has a lot less tolerance for other people’s minor problems and this has affected her friendships.
I have no… tolerance, I guess you would say, for people who have minor problems and whine about them. And that affects my relationships with a lot of people, because they’ll be whining about something that’s like really, really minor. And yes, it’s a problem for them and I understand that, but if I only had those problems I would be jumping for joy. If my kid flunked a course and had to take it—oh, actually my son has, because when he was on chemo he flunked a lot of courses because he was too sick to go, and you don’t get a tuition rebate when it’s half way through the term. So I have accepted the fact that—I don’t care—I’ll gladly pay for more courses. You just take them again. It’s not a problem.
Other people whose kids flunk courses, they’re complaining and whining, “Oh, they flunked a course. They’re never going to be a success in life.” I’m like, “Give it up man. Be thankful your kid’s healthy!” So that has tainted my relationships with a lot of people because of the anger and the fact that I’m constantly reliving a lot of the crap that I’ve been through and people don’t want to hear about it anymore; that’s affected my relationships with people. So from a psychological perspective, it’s had a really negative impact on me.
More from: Sheni
- Trying to find the right balance – SheniWhen her husband was in the hospital, Sheni did all she could to help her children through this period.
- Support from family and friends – SheniSheni’s family-in-law did not offer any help. In fact, they made it harder for her.
- Social impact and lifestyle changes – SheniSheni notices that she has a lot less tolerance for other people’s minor problems and this has affected her friendships.
- Legal issues – SheniSheni’s power of attorney was revoked after her sister-in-law contacted the Public Guardian. Sheni thinks it is important to read up on the rules of power of attorney to avoid any issues.
- Interaction with professionals – SheniSheni describes two occasions where she had a disagreement with the doctors.
- Financial impact – SheniSheni and her husband had always been self-employed. In just a few weeks, they lost all their income.
- Impact on professional life and career 2 – SheniWhen her son started radiation therapy for his brain tumour, Sheni had to take time off work. Unfortunately, her manager was not very understanding.
- Impact on professional life and career – SheniIt is difficult to work while caring for someone at home. Sheni dealt with situations that she felt most people never have to deal with.
- Home care and live-in caregivers – SheniSheni found the live-in caregiver very helpful, especially since she could check-in with him at home during the day.
- Health system issues – SheniFor Sheni, it was impossible to work and find care for her husband.